Alcohol & Anxiety
I remember it like it was yesterday, it was 2007 and I had just had one of the biggest scares of my drinking, where I was in London conducting a business meeting and because of all my drinking I ended up having a really nasty fall and I remember coming out of that meeting thinking something has got to change, I have to start to get sober. So I decided I would go and see a Therapist and chuck out all my bad memories and deal with all this stuff that had been plaguing me. So I went to this Therapist and she had told me one of my issues was that I had anxiety, now up until this point I always had a feeling in my body, but I never knew what it was and until the moment she told me, I never really dealt with it.
Once she labelled it Anxiety I was off to the races, I walked out of her office, quivering and shaking, because this thing she named anxiety, has now become a real big thing in my life, it has now become this monster that is overtaking me.I was dealing with Anxiety, while I was drinking and while I was not all the time and all these books and all these websites, told me different ways to deal with anxiety. I found something that really works and i@m going to share that with you.
So Anxiety is about future, anxiety is about "This is going to happen", "people are going to tease me", "I'm going to look like an idiot"
So Anxiety is all about the future, which means we're living in the future, and not living in the now.
So we have this Anxiety, what it got to do with drinking? after she told me I had Anxiety, from that point I noticed when I took a drink, it was gone. I would go into a social situation or I would give a speech, and where I would normally be Anxious, if I had a drink I wasn't, I could talk like a king, my confidence was sky high, so I knew if I had a drink the anxiety would go away.
Now what is happening is , were training our brain,our brain is learning it says "hey I don't like this", "I have Anxiety" I have a drink and it goes away, now this goes to the brain, "BING" "BING" "BING", we have a solution, go and have a drink, over and over and over again, over time once you have drink number 1, drink number 2, drink number 3, over and over again every time you do this to relieve the Anxiety and your brain is learning this, now what happens over time like any substance you become immune.
So your body is now becoming immune to the Anxiety, in the beginning, you had 2 drinks and you talked like a king, but now it takes you 6, or 9 or 12, or worse its stops working, this is the dangerous part, because when it stops working all your left with is Anxiety and no relief. I remember a time I was going to go for a walk, I couldn't even make it to the end of my street, a walk I did all the time, I was a mess. I had to go and drink, even though it wasn't even working.. So what happening is, you know have Anxiety and no relief, the Anxiety is building up, you trained it to go down with the drinking, and now you're stuck with only Anxiety.
So what is the answer?
Well first of all ,it has all reversed on you, instead of Anxiety and drinking being the relief and the big cycle, drink relief, drink relief, now the drinking is actually causing the anxiety, because there is no "mellow" out stuff left in your body or brain and the "mellow" out stuff has been killed and now your just stuck with Anxiety. So whats the question here, well number one you have to realise that alcohol is causing your Anxiety. So the very thing you think is helping, is, in fact, causing your Anxiety, your worst fear has become a reality, your keer has become your worst nightmare, because it is now actually causing your anxiety, and now because your brain says "yeh" I still think alcohol works, whats happening is your brain is now producing all this Anxiety and you have no relief.
So this is whats going on here,
Can alcohol cause Anxiety- Yes
It is actually causing the anxiety by dampening down the natural thing that goes against Anxiety, the natural things that calm you down are gone because your brain thinks it doesn't need it anymore because I have this alcohol, that works and works............Until it doesn't.
So whats the key because when I first had this anxiety I thought I had to fight, so I would sit there thinking the whole world and his brother was watching me and I would fight it, but what I realised...Is what does it come from? I realised Anxiety is about control, your sitting there right, and your all nervous the'res loads of people about and you think they are all looking at you and you think they know you have this Anxiety, but they don't ,so you are causing all this Anxiety and you are fighting the Anxiety to control your situation, Anxiety is about control and you think you have to fight it, and the best way to fight it is to drink, but the drinking is now causing the anxiety.
So whats the secret, because we can't drink anymore it doesn't work anymore and even if it is still working, it's going to end up causing the Anxiety. So we try fighting, but you realise fighting isn't working, and fighting only makes it worse, how many times have you been a place and tried fighting it, and this cycle, you can't even concentrate, you can't focus, it's making you all jittery and crazy, its all you can think about, you might as well not even be in the place, because your not really there anyway.
There is a thing I learned while dealing with this,
One of the things I struggled with was, none of my Anxiety had no like, "word, type, thought" to it. It wasn't like I sat there and went "Those guys are going to kick my butt" no it was just a feeling, no thoughts, no feelings.
What I did realise, was most of it, if not all of it was not real, nothing was going to happen. Social, situational, chemical, no one thinks about me more than me. Anxiety comes from control, you think everyone is looking at you, everyone cares about you, when in fact no-one gives a rip, and the fact of the matter is, this is something going on inside of you.
Again.... remember Anxiety was about the future, if you have anxiety you are not fully living in the now, think about it, that's why there is so much talk about "living for the now" taking one day, one minute at a time because this future thing is where Anxiety lives.Its all in the future and it's not real, you don't know whats going to happen in the future, you can't really change tomorrow, there are things you can do to make tomorrow better, but you can't really change whats going to happen.
You can only deal with tomorrow when it comes, knowing that Anxiety is not real will make the difference, tell yourself "Anxiety is not real, its all about things I can't control, its about giving up control, that's why there is so much talk about "giving up" giving up the control, instead of fighting Anxiety, just give up to it, and say "well there it is" they'res that Anxiety thing again, its probably some chemical thing going on, might have had to much sugar, or that extra cup of coffee probably wasn't a good idea, the fact of the matter is you don't have to fight it anymore, because you know what it is.
Back in the day when I was drinking I didn't know what it was, I didn't know I drank to get rid of the Anxiety, but then it started to give me no relief, which made me think I was going crazy. all this could have been averted if someone would have told me that this is not real, your worst nightmares, your worst fears, your worst Anxiety is not real its something your mind is making up to scare you, its something chemical. All these thoughts 99% of them will never come true, a lot of stuff we make up in our mind is a lot worse than it really is.
Once we learn, yes we now know that alcohol is causing our Anxiety, and we need to learn how to stop drinking, we need to train ourselves to be OK with it. Say to yourself, Yes I am Anxious its fine, it's going to be OK, keep telling yourself over and over, it's going to be OK it's going to be alright. You don't have to fight anymore, people don't know you have Anxiety, people don't know the conflict going on inside your mind, and the fact of the matter is, it wasn't even real, that's it, just something fabricated by alcohol, bad thoughts and bad thought patterns.
OK, lets recap,
The best thing you can do right now is JUST BE, stop trying to control it, you don't have to control it now because you know what it is.
Once she labelled it Anxiety I was off to the races, I walked out of her office, quivering and shaking, because this thing she named anxiety, has now become a real big thing in my life, it has now become this monster that is overtaking me.I was dealing with Anxiety, while I was drinking and while I was not all the time and all these books and all these websites, told me different ways to deal with anxiety. I found something that really works and i@m going to share that with you.
- What we are going to do is number 1 talk about Alcohol & Anxiety
- We're going to talk about does and can alcohol cause anxiety
- We're going to take about anxiety and alcohol abuse
- Alcohol and depression and anxiety
- Alcohol-induced anxiety
So Anxiety is about future, anxiety is about "This is going to happen", "people are going to tease me", "I'm going to look like an idiot"
So Anxiety is all about the future, which means we're living in the future, and not living in the now.
So we have this Anxiety, what it got to do with drinking? after she told me I had Anxiety, from that point I noticed when I took a drink, it was gone. I would go into a social situation or I would give a speech, and where I would normally be Anxious, if I had a drink I wasn't, I could talk like a king, my confidence was sky high, so I knew if I had a drink the anxiety would go away.
Now what is happening is , were training our brain,our brain is learning it says "hey I don't like this", "I have Anxiety" I have a drink and it goes away, now this goes to the brain, "BING" "BING" "BING", we have a solution, go and have a drink, over and over and over again, over time once you have drink number 1, drink number 2, drink number 3, over and over again every time you do this to relieve the Anxiety and your brain is learning this, now what happens over time like any substance you become immune.
So your body is now becoming immune to the Anxiety, in the beginning, you had 2 drinks and you talked like a king, but now it takes you 6, or 9 or 12, or worse its stops working, this is the dangerous part, because when it stops working all your left with is Anxiety and no relief. I remember a time I was going to go for a walk, I couldn't even make it to the end of my street, a walk I did all the time, I was a mess. I had to go and drink, even though it wasn't even working.. So what happening is, you know have Anxiety and no relief, the Anxiety is building up, you trained it to go down with the drinking, and now you're stuck with only Anxiety.
So what is the answer?
Well first of all ,it has all reversed on you, instead of Anxiety and drinking being the relief and the big cycle, drink relief, drink relief, now the drinking is actually causing the anxiety, because there is no "mellow" out stuff left in your body or brain and the "mellow" out stuff has been killed and now your just stuck with Anxiety. So whats the question here, well number one you have to realise that alcohol is causing your Anxiety. So the very thing you think is helping, is, in fact, causing your Anxiety, your worst fear has become a reality, your keer has become your worst nightmare, because it is now actually causing your anxiety, and now because your brain says "yeh" I still think alcohol works, whats happening is your brain is now producing all this Anxiety and you have no relief.
So this is whats going on here,
Can alcohol cause Anxiety- Yes
It is actually causing the anxiety by dampening down the natural thing that goes against Anxiety, the natural things that calm you down are gone because your brain thinks it doesn't need it anymore because I have this alcohol, that works and works............Until it doesn't.
So whats the key because when I first had this anxiety I thought I had to fight, so I would sit there thinking the whole world and his brother was watching me and I would fight it, but what I realised...Is what does it come from? I realised Anxiety is about control, your sitting there right, and your all nervous the'res loads of people about and you think they are all looking at you and you think they know you have this Anxiety, but they don't ,so you are causing all this Anxiety and you are fighting the Anxiety to control your situation, Anxiety is about control and you think you have to fight it, and the best way to fight it is to drink, but the drinking is now causing the anxiety.
So whats the secret, because we can't drink anymore it doesn't work anymore and even if it is still working, it's going to end up causing the Anxiety. So we try fighting, but you realise fighting isn't working, and fighting only makes it worse, how many times have you been a place and tried fighting it, and this cycle, you can't even concentrate, you can't focus, it's making you all jittery and crazy, its all you can think about, you might as well not even be in the place, because your not really there anyway.
There is a thing I learned while dealing with this,
- IT IS NOT REAL
- Social, is where we are afraid, "Is someone going to be better than us", "Is someone going to fight with us"
- Situational, are you anxious about a situation, when I went to rehab I had situational Anxiety all the time I was there, Anxious about was anyone going to kill me, Anxious if I even had a home when I came out.It's all chemical because it's all causing something in your body.
One of the things I struggled with was, none of my Anxiety had no like, "word, type, thought" to it. It wasn't like I sat there and went "Those guys are going to kick my butt" no it was just a feeling, no thoughts, no feelings.
What I did realise, was most of it, if not all of it was not real, nothing was going to happen. Social, situational, chemical, no one thinks about me more than me. Anxiety comes from control, you think everyone is looking at you, everyone cares about you, when in fact no-one gives a rip, and the fact of the matter is, this is something going on inside of you.
Again.... remember Anxiety was about the future, if you have anxiety you are not fully living in the now, think about it, that's why there is so much talk about "living for the now" taking one day, one minute at a time because this future thing is where Anxiety lives.Its all in the future and it's not real, you don't know whats going to happen in the future, you can't really change tomorrow, there are things you can do to make tomorrow better, but you can't really change whats going to happen.
You can only deal with tomorrow when it comes, knowing that Anxiety is not real will make the difference, tell yourself "Anxiety is not real, its all about things I can't control, its about giving up control, that's why there is so much talk about "giving up" giving up the control, instead of fighting Anxiety, just give up to it, and say "well there it is" they'res that Anxiety thing again, its probably some chemical thing going on, might have had to much sugar, or that extra cup of coffee probably wasn't a good idea, the fact of the matter is you don't have to fight it anymore, because you know what it is.
Back in the day when I was drinking I didn't know what it was, I didn't know I drank to get rid of the Anxiety, but then it started to give me no relief, which made me think I was going crazy. all this could have been averted if someone would have told me that this is not real, your worst nightmares, your worst fears, your worst Anxiety is not real its something your mind is making up to scare you, its something chemical. All these thoughts 99% of them will never come true, a lot of stuff we make up in our mind is a lot worse than it really is.
Once we learn, yes we now know that alcohol is causing our Anxiety, and we need to learn how to stop drinking, we need to train ourselves to be OK with it. Say to yourself, Yes I am Anxious its fine, it's going to be OK, keep telling yourself over and over, it's going to be OK it's going to be alright. You don't have to fight anymore, people don't know you have Anxiety, people don't know the conflict going on inside your mind, and the fact of the matter is, it wasn't even real, that's it, just something fabricated by alcohol, bad thoughts and bad thought patterns.
OK, lets recap,
- Alcohol is causing your Anxiety and you need to knock it on the head because it doesn't work anymore
- You don't have to fight anymore, fighting makes it worse, fighting makes it real, it's NOT REAL, realise it's not real.
- Then focus on your breathing.
- Focus on where you are right now.
- Focus on the fact you can't change most of what you're worried about
The best thing you can do right now is JUST BE, stop trying to control it, you don't have to control it now because you know what it is.
